Monday, September 29, 2014

Tough Love

Have you ever been venting to someone and when it came time for them to give some much-needed advice, it just... wasn't what you wanted to hear? Or if you get a double whammy, it wasn't what you wanted to hear and it just downright hurt. I'm right in saying we've all had those moments, right? Am I also right in saying that often times, friendships take complete turns after someone is just completely honest with you? Whether it be about where they're at, or where you're at, the raw truth can have serious impacts on friendships.

If total honesty is a bit pre-meditated, there's a really good chance most of us would push whomever read us like a book away-- especially if they weren't one of our best, best friends. Resentment is far easier to feel than most emotions. It's easy to take the anger you may be feeling towards yourself or a given situation out on other people. The person I tend to get annoyed with most easily when something isn't going my way? My mom. Anyone else?!

We've all been in those shoes. The shoes where we either have to be completely honest with a friend, no matter how much it might hurt them. Or the shoes where we're completely caught off guard by what a friend might have to say. It's tough love folks. And it sucks.

The thing we have to remember is nobody ever wants to give tough love, and nobody ever wants to receive it. Either way you cut it, the intentions of whomever is giving it are always pure. If they didn't love you, they wouldn't feel they could be so honest with you. 

While it might suck, I don't think anything really grows us like the harsh reality of things. And when it's coming from somebody you love, it sucks even more. Tough love can be hard to accept. It can be hard to give. At the end of the day though, we have to remember that tough love is still love. It hurts you and strengthens you, just like love does. You must be thankful if you have people in your life willing to point out wrongs and help make them right, not everyone does.



Lauren said...

I have definitely been in a situation when the advice was something I didn't want to hear, but sometimes the thing you don't want to hear is the very things someone needed to say.


Valerie said...

That's funny you mention you get annoyed most with your mom because I'm the same way. Sometimes when I ask for her advice she tells me the exact opposite of what I want to hear and I just get so frustrated! But I've definitely been on both spectrums - giving tough love and receiving it. The majority of the time when I'm getting it, I try to prevent myself from getting "mad" at the person because deep down I know they're right. I do have one friend that gives out "tough love" a little too much and it's usually just... not helpful. Or accurate advice. I always try to give tough love with the best intentions but I have had friends who have gotten annoyed with me (ironically it has come most from the one friend I have who loves giving out tough love, ha.) You're right though, it's certainly needed sometimes!

Emily Blauvelt said...

So true Lauren!

Emily Blauvelt said...

I totally agree with you! It's so not easy to give, or receive. But usually it's for the best! Thanks for reading :)